One of the great moments in my life is when I discover the real me doesn’t want to “get away” with anything. My motives are not evil. That ship sailed at the cross. My motives can actually be trusted. I’m a new creature. I’m Christ in me. I’m fused together with Him. I’m loved beyond all telling by a God who never makes a mistake, and who will eventually refashion any misfortune, in some manner, into better than if it had never happened. I’m not looking for a loophole. I’m loved completely, forgiven always, enjoyed without end, changed already, right on time in my maturity and free to not stress over who I might think I should be by now. And I won’t trade that in for the illusion of stability in self-effort, striving, performing, assuaging or complying. I’m too old to go back to prison.